Saturday, April 30, 2016

Horrible Movie Review: The Switch

Yesterday I saw one of the stupidest movies I've ever seen.  Not necessarily a "bad" movie, just one of the stupidest ones.  This movie is "The Switch", a 2010 rom-com starring Jason Bateman and Jennifer Aniston.


In the movie, Wally (Bateman) is best friends with Kassie (Aniston).  Kassie has decided she'd like to have a baby and wants to go the sperm bank route.  Wally suggests he could be the father, because he's had a crush on Kassie for a long time.  Kassie objects, but they remain friends.

Through a comedy of errors Wally hijacks the sperm bank donation and substitutes his own sperm.  So ... Kassie's baby is actually his own.

Kassie begins dating the (presumed) biological father Roland at some point in the future.  Despite Roland being in the picture, Wally becomes an even better father figure to Kassie's son (his biological son) than the presumed biological father.

At the climax of the movie, Wally reveals he is the biological father to both Kassie and Roland.

Now at this point in the movie, what do you think should happen?

A) Kassie enters a murderous rage and kills Wally
B) A more mild form of violence occurs, such as a beating, and possibly through proxy of another individual (such as Roland)
C) Kassie gets a lawyer and sues Wally for everything he owns
D) Kassie is pissed as hell, moves away, and they never see each other again
E) Kassie realizes Wally is her true love and they live happily ever after

Living in a civilized society and not believing Aniston wants to move into a new genre of film, I suppose 'C' or 'D' would be the most likely thing to happen.  However, I think 'A' or 'B' would have been a reasonably expected response given the circumstances of how horrible this was.

But since this is a Hollywood rom-com, the answer is in fact 'E'.  About the stupidest thing I think could possibly happen.

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